Forgive me Internet, for I have sinned.
I made you a promise and I have gone back on that promise. On April 1, 2012 I quit smoking and told you all about it. By the fall of the same year, I was smoking again. Many people do not know because I hid it for so long. I was ashamed, and that was the point.
There are many reasons to quit. It is terribly unhealthy, it is a stupid extra cost to add to a budget, and in this day and age most people find it – and you – disgusting. However, at the end of the day, the best and most motivating reason is because so many people I care about want me to not smoke.
That blog post, in my mind, was the single most important tool I had when quitting. The support and encouragement were great. The fear of judgment and disappointment even greater.
But, I need it all that help and support all over again. I was afraid that the blog post idea was a one shot deal – that I couldn’t go back to the well again. But, I really do want to quit once and for all and I’m willing to admit to all of you that I relapsed to help make sure it that this time it sticks.
Tomorrow, Monday, March 18th, I will not smoke anymore. Forgive my sins, dear Internet. Please, show me the way.